Day 42, JP 20. My Father

page 20

[[[[My Dad came by for a visit a couple days ago. It was really nice to see him away from the house. We went for a nice walk.  First he wanted me to know that he doesn’t think i’m crazy. That he has an understanding of What was happening. It was really nice to hear, to have someone in my corner. That means a lot to me. thank you Dad. So this is what it feels like to have a Dad Who’s got your back. It feels good to cut the shit and say what I feel.  I just got everything I wanted from my Dad.]]]]

I come from a broken home and I am talking about my step-Dad here, that said he is the one who raised me and was always there for me even when I couldn’t see it. This man is my Father, my Dad and I love him for it. It takes a lot of courage to do what he did, step into the role of a Dad especially when the “red-headed step-child” is a broken angry mess. This man was a constant, a ground and there were times I hated him for it and resented him for the stability because I could not relate to it. He was the calm quiet voice of reason that was so often drowned out by my anger.

Never mistake the quiet man for a weak man as its often the opposite, This is something I have learned from my Father not because he told me but because of his example. I learned from him not by listening but by watching and letting his actions speak to me. This man who had a hand in raising me taught me many lessons over the years and was also humble enough to tell me when I had taught him something of value. We have each benefited from sharing our lives with each other and I could not have asked for more from anyone.

He was there to play co-op Doom 2 with me and took great pleasure in shooting me “by accident” as friendly fire was a thing. We played several games over the years including scorched earth ( little tanks shooting at each other). My favorite memory was Duke Nukem 3d in which there were pipe bombs that I would throw while hiding in the vent, He would go to check what the noise was every time just to get blown up again. He was my first gaming buddy and He played for the pure joy of it.

My Father taught me the value of true emotions as he never wasted a laugh on something that he didn’t find funny or a tear on something that didn’t tug on his heart. My Father and I have not always agreed on things over the years but he was always there when I needed him and he was always happy to put down what he was doing to give me some of his time.

Dad you were the perfect piece to fill the hole that was left in our family and now you are my family.

Dad, you did good. Thank you.

 

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